Tuesday, December 8, 2009
An Open Letter to Santa
I know that most of the letters you get are from people listing things they want you to bring to them on Christmas. That must get old after a while. . .letter after letter, year after year, "Gimme, gimme, gimme!". I thought maybe you would like a change of pace this year, so I'm writing this letter listing things I want to give you. I'm not saying you have to take these on Christmas Day, either. You can work at your leisure and tend to them anytime during 2010. I will list them in the order of their importance, for your added convenience.
First, I would like to give you the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq Do you think you could just pack all that dissention and violence in your sleigh and dispose of it, so all the troops serving there can come safely home to their families? I can assure you that Al Quida and the Taliban will not be missed.
World hunger is another item you can pack on your sleigh. If there's a way you could put an end to that, a lot of empty stomachs would be relieved. I'll admit, I'm not sure if that's one you could accomplish with out a "gimme." It may mean finding a way to feed all those people, but I'm sure if you put your elves on it, they could come up with a plan.
Then there's domestic violence. If you could find a way to remove the anger and hate that brews among family members and couples, so that the only things left would be love, understanding, and tolerance--now that would be a great help.
Okay, now my gifts to you take on a more personal note; if you could find your way clear to take those extra pounds that seem to have piled on these bones of mine over the past 20 years, and maybe a few of the wrinkles and gray hairs that have also accumulated, I'd be totally appreciative!
I know I'm offering some pretty big items, but any of the above that you could see your way clear to pile on your sleigh and take with you could make a big difference in many lives in the coming year. And instead of milk and cookies, I'll leave beer and pretzels for you. Deal?