Saturday, December 19, 2009

The Santa Gender Mind Bender

Ever since the very first tales of Santa began,

All have assumed that Santa’s a man.

Listen here: You may find it odd—

But I’m willing to bet that Santa’s a broad!

The gifts kids receive---all picked by a guy?

The same species that’s been known to buy

Their holiday gifts on Christmas Eve?

A plan-ahead- dude is hard to believe!

I suppose the elves could do all that wrapping—

We know for sure, a guy would be napping.

Would then he deliver his selections,

Without stopping once to ask for directions?

Fat chance of that, I would have to say;

With no GPS until recent day!

Do you know any man who’d admit being lost?

They’re way too stubborn, regardless the cost!

Then there’s the usual cookies and milk—

Would most guys be happy with things of that ilk?

No, I think not. Here’s what I fear,

If Santa’s a man, he’d want pretzels and beer!

Just give it some thought

And I’m sure you’ll agree:

No way it’s a man—

Santa must be a SHE!

(an original poem by Eva Gallant)


Rinkly Rimes said...

Good verses and an original idea! I like the Jolly fat lady too!

UberGrumpy said...

But if she's a man
then the gifts will be late
She'll be doing her make up
'Til quarter to eight

Karen, author of "My Funny Dad, Harry" said...

This is a first! This is so cute and very original, I love it but what a novel idea but then what about Mrs. Claus? I really do still think Santa is a man with extraordinary leadership skills--he gets A LOT of help!

UberGrumpy makes a good point! LOL!

heidi @ wonder woman wannabe said...

heh, heh - too cute! Visiting from SITS Sharefest! Have a great day!!

Masala Chica said...

I hadn't thought of that possibility but I think you're on to something! Visiting from SITS - thanks for stopping by!

The Retired One said...

Too funny, Eva. It HAS to be correct!

Two Normal Moms said...

Too funny! I enjoyed that - Stopping by from SITS.

jinksy said...

I can tell, you've been there, done that, lady santa!

Steven Anthony said...

Im a man, but must agree....or else his wife does all the work and he takes all the credit, now that could be;)

Helene said...

I loved this and I totally think you're onto something here. Either that or it's really Mrs. Claus who does all the shopping, wrapping, etc and then lets her husband take all the credit because that's what we women do sometimes!

JEN said...

Clever. You are quite a writer of poetry........I think Steve Anthony has the answer....Santa is a man, who takes all the credit after Mrs. Santa does all the work!!!!

The Lucy and Dick Show said...

Well, I always figured that the pre planning, multi tasking and gumption came from Mrs. Claus!

Terra said...

Very cute, but as I travel around town shopping, wearing my Santa hat, when folks say "Santa you are here", I tell them I am Mrs. Santa, and Mr. Santa is very busy at the North Pole coordinating wish lists.
So Santa really is a guy and is my dear husband.

Kitty Moore said...

That had never crossed my mind but it makes absolute sense!

Cinnamon-Girl Reeni♥ said...

That is adorable! And every word is so true!

Tam said...

Very clever, Eva! And totally true. :)

Eva Gallant said...

Rinkly: That's my face photo-shopped on Ssanta! lol

Uber: Good comeback!

Karen: In my mind, there is no Mr. & Mrs. That is a myth perpetuated by those who realize a male Santa could never handle the job! My MS Santa has it all under control!

Heidi: Thanks for stopping by!

Kiran: thanks for visiting!

Retired: Glad you agree!

Ally: Glad you stopped by!

Jinksy: yep!

Steven: Either way, I rest my case!

Helene: Glad you liked it!

Jen: Thank you!

Lucy: Too true!

Terra: Whatever works!

Kitty:, Reeni. & Tam: Glad you agree!

Bombshell BLISS said...

Got something for you over on my blog friend!

My name is PJ. said...

You share the best stuff!

ethelmaepotter! said...

This is my new favorite Christmas verse!
However, I must agree with the Santa-is-a-man-who-takes-all-of-the-missus'-credit camp. You know what they say - "Behind every great man is a woman!"

Unknown Mami said...

You are hilarious. I no you can't be Santa because as far as I know Santa has not retired.

Happy Holidays. Love the photo of the tree in your other post.

Meeko Fabulous said...

I love it! And I agree . . . LoL!

BPOTW said...

I believe I have to agree!! Thanks for the giggles.

Sandy said...

You make a lot of sense!

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