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Saturday, April 24, 2010

Some Saturday Silliness


After the eighty-three year old lady finished her annual physical examination, the doctor said, "You are in fine shape for your age, Mrs. Mallory, but tell me, do you still have intercourse?"

"Just a minute, I'll have to ask my husband," she said. She stepped out into the crowded reception room and yelled out loud: "Bob, do we still have intercourse?"

And there was such a hush you could hear a pin drop.

Bob answered impatiently, "If I told you once, Irma, I toldyou a hundred times...What we have is Blue Cross!”




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An old man, Mr. Wallace, was living in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong,

'Yes, Nurse Tracy ,' said Mr. Wallace.  'My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.'

Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace. Please accept my condolences.'
The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas.
He met Nurse Tracy.

 'Mr. Wallace,' she said, 'You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that.Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas.'

'But, Nurse Tracy I can't,' replied Mr. Wallace. 'I told you yesterday that my Private Part died.'

'Yes,' said Nurse Tracy, 'you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?'

'Well,' he replied, 'Today is the viewing.'


***********************



A Wife asks her Husband, How many

Women have you slept with?

Husband proudly replies, Only You, Darling-With all the Others, I was awake!

Hospital Visiting Hours are: 10am - 4pm.

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! 
(This was set to publish at 12:15 am....don't know what happened!
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13 comments:

DJan said...

Boy, trying to think how to respond to THIS post, Eva, is straining my brain! So, I'll just say... (blush)

R.J. said...

You're too funny Eva. You win, I won't try to compete with your humor. At my age, sometimes saying less is better. You always make me smile.

Brian Miller said...

teehee...today is the viewing...lol. thanks for the chuckles...

Steven Anthony said...

lol........these r way to funny;)

Unknown Mami said...

I used to have Blue Cross. Intercourse is way better.

Janiece said...

OH MY GOSH....laughing out loud on those!!

Mary at Deep South Dish said...

OMG LMAO!! :) Thanks for the giggles.

LoveMy2Dogs said...

OMGosh that is just too funny. Thanks for the laughs.

Eva Gallant said...

Steven: Always glad to tickle your funny bone (no pun intended!)

LoveMy2:Happy to make you smile!

Jen said...

so funny....lol....

Respectfully Yours said...

excellent, really made me laugh. Thanks.

Eva Gallant said...

Respectfully: Glad as always to make you laugh!

Jen: glad you're chuckling, Sis!

gayle said...

So funny!!!