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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

What Did You Look For In A Man?

When a woman is 22, she has a list of things she wants in a man:

Original List


1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)


1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)

1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5.. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6.. Is in good enough shape to get off the couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6.. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend


What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)

1. BREATHING
2. DOESN'T MISS THE TOILET




Which may mean there's hope for most guys, as long as they aren't too picky about a woman's age!
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17 comments:

Wow, that was awkward said...

Doesn't miss the toilet? Missing the toilet starts during potty training and never ends. Sometimes I amaze myself at my own misfirings.

Kristina P. said...

I think your expectations may just be too high.

M.R. said...

LOL My Hubs meets most of those and maybe even a few still from the earlier revisions. Gotta say though, he missed the toilet in his 20's and he's still missing it in his 50's. I'd say all in all, your expectations are right on the money! And right on the funny!

Brian Miller said...

whew...at 72 i am looking pretty good then...smiles.

Whatever Dee-Dee wants said...

Too funny!

DJan said...

Sometimes I wonder about you, Eva. Your brain is wired funny. And I do mean funny! Thanks for the laughs, once again.

R. J. said...

You nailed it. I think I would add one item to every list. I like a man who not only talks to me, but listens carefully to what I say. I also like a man who looks at a woman's face rather than objectifying women by looking only at their bodies. My list isn't funny like yours, but it is important to me.

glnroz said...

Well, I got one out of two in the last catagory.. how does that rate? :(

natalee said...

LOL!!!!!!!! I see my list changing/// lol.......

Bossy Betty said...

Oh my gosh--this was so funny AND true!

Jen said...

I think the last list, well the no. on that list is on every womens wish list!!!! Too funny, but true!

Steven Anthony said...

hahahahah gawd lady you are funny;) luv it .

Vodka Logic said...

That is funny.. glad I already found a man... lol

Pat said...

Depressing.....but oh so true!

Annah said...

Bahahhahaa. AWESOMENESS

And I am so with you in the whole keeping ear and nose hair trimmed. That is so friggin' disgusting!

Big big turn-off.

lakeviewer said...

Got put this up on the refrigerator!

Eva Gallant said...

MR: So glad you found them "right on th funny."

Jen: Sad but true!

Steven: Glad I can keep you smiling!