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Monday, October 18, 2010

A Caution to Retirees And Other Men With Free Time on Their Hands.

It would seem that satisfying your salacious desires may be hazardous to your health.  Last week I posted about the fellow in Texas who was found dead (possibly by stroke?) in the video booth at a porn shop.  Now I just discovered (NOT thru personal experience) that engaging a lapdancer has its own dangers!

The Cheetah Club near West Palm Beach Florida just settled a dispute with Michael Ireland, a patron who had visited the laptop dance club and got more than an eyeful. 
  

                                                       
Online accounts of what happened vary.  One source states that the injury occurred during a lapdance; another states the stripper, named  Suki, was walking on the bar when someone slapped her on the butt.  She turned and kicked, her stilletto heel catching Ireland in the eye, shattering his eye socket and other bones in his face.  After several surgeries, Ireland suffers from permanent double vision, which interferes with his ability to work in his job as a roofer.

The Club decided to settle out of court for $650.000, fearing that a lawsuit might result in greater damages.  According to Jay Leno, this was a case of Mr. Ireland being "in the thong place at the thong time."  No information was available to confirm or disprove the rumor Mr. Ireland requested that the settlement be paid in all one dollar bills or that the plaintiff would have been willing to drop the suit if Suki was willing to turn the other cheek.


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25 comments:

Marla said...

Ok, this is funny in a sick demented sort of way. Dogs!

Kristina P. said...

Wow, at least it wasn't his testicles!

ethelmaepotter! said...

OMG! I know a Michael Ireland! I better go visit him and see if he has a stilletto heel stuck in his eye!

BLOGitse said...

I guess all women have met Michael Ireland! I have, years ago, but didn't have stilettos.
Those michael irelands don't understand: look but don't touch.
Oh men.......

Gaston Studio said...

You go in those places, you take the consequences for being there, IMHO.

glnroz said...

one more thing to be careful of,, lol

Debbie said...

You know....I used to always be on the side of the "girl" in these cases....like "he deserved it" but as I get older I realize that they both get what they deserve. She is not exactly a secretary....let's face it!!

natalee said...

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thongplace..thong time LOL!!!!!!!

DJan said...

I will never understand those shoes. Do you think this whole thing actually occurred or is just a great story? I hope it was a hoax, for the sake of the poor guy who was in the thong place. :-)

Brian Miller said...

note to self...during lapdances keep the feet away from the eyes...errr....odd...

David Waters said...

double vision: so next time at a club he gets double for his dollor:)

Steven Anthony said...

with a lap dance I can think of at least one other place a heal might be worse than the eye...,just saying;)

wendy said...

ha ha, that is just dang funny

Kathy said...

Thanks for giving me the best laugh of the day...Thong place, thong time..too funny!

Jen said...

Kristina had my thought EXACTLY!!! What a doof!! And why was she on the bar.....?????!!!!Sounds like a hoax?? ...Maybe??Or maybe "trick-not treat"!!

Poetic Shutterbug said...

You continually "crack" me up. Stilettos are great weapons :D

Pat said...

I sure hope Michael Ireland wasn't married, because some of that $650,000 is paying for his divorce otherwise!

Ms. Wanda said...

Love this:) You have the best stories!!!!

Eva Gallant said...

Marla: Funny, sick and demented about sums it up!

Glen: It's my job to keep you safe!

Blogitse: And no means no.

Debbie: Right!

Steven: Ouch....that's true!

K A B L O O E Y said...

Isn't that what bouncers are for?

Bossy Betty said...

Thanks for the heads-up! I am installing furniture protectors on my stillettos.

Martha Ruth said...

If I tried to wear heels like that, I'd put my own eye out!

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

I gotta get heels like that!!!!! And YOU are one funny lady!!! Love your blog. :)

Anonymous said...

Helpful blog, bookmarked the website with hopes to read more!

Wrighton said...

Very odd and extremely interesting. Who would have thought the Karma could come in the form of stiletos. Now I know, wow, how fashionable it that?
Great story, thanks for sharing.