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Wednesday, March 7, 2012

More Random Thoughts on the Road

I have a complaint for the Florida Department of Tourism.  On our way to Key West, Florida, we drove over a section of Interstate 75 called "Alligator Alley;"  I kid you not; that's the way it's labelled on the road map.

I was excited.  I had my camera ready.  For over 100 miles I had my camera ready!  I did not see one alligator; not one slimy tail, not one bulging eyeball, not one huge jaw.  Okay, I admit that I may have seen evidence that alligators had been there.  Huge, hungry, ferocious alligators.  Alligators huge, hungry, and ferocious enough to gobble up entire vehicles and spit out their shredded tires.   There were slabs of shredded rubber strewn about on the highway.  My theory is the alligators ate the vehicles, but had no use for the rubber....not wanting to hinder their reproductive capabilities.


Also, I saw several instances where innocent pedestrians had been gobbled up as well, and crosses with flowers on them had been placed at the site of the snacking in memory of the late lunchee. 

Yes I saw all of the evidence, but no actual alligators.  This amounts to a misrepresentation.  That section of Interstate 75 between Tampa and Homestead (I hope I have the names of the cities correctly; I'm writing this at 10:30 p.m. and my brain is sooooooooo tired!) that section of highway should not be called Alligator Alley; it should be called Gator Gone

14 comments:

Brian Miller said...

wow...have driven that road a lot...and used to see just slews of alligators...

you may remember one got my cat too...but she survived...

Simone said...

Bummer! No gators??

Steadfast Ahoy! said...

Like Brian, I've driven that road several times and like you, I have NEVER seen one ole crock! Of course, if we had gotten out and walked along the ditches...could have been another story, or so they say.
Rosemary

tattytiara said...

I'm blessed to live an easy drive up the road from a beautiful national park that has stunning hiking trails and an insane amount of wildlife. I know never, ever to take the trail called Beaver Hills for two reasons: 1) it's always packed with people hoping to see beavers and 2) it's the trail you're least likely to see beavers on. Thing about beavers is, they use the resources in a place up and then move on, and the trail was named a long time ago! That long winded blathering aside, the place to see gators in Florida is that natural area around Cape Canaveral. They were everywhere!

PⒿ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

I laughed hard at 'hindering their reproductive capabilities.'

One place to guarantee gator siting in Key West is on the golf courses. Oy

River said...

Or perhaps Gator Raid? (gatorade)

How disappointing to see not one single gator!

ipenka said...

Rubber bit was hilarious. Took me a while but it was hilarious.

They probably said "See ya later, ----!"

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Hahaha, my sister and I drove through alligator alley a few years back and all we saw was NOTHINGNESS. NO alligators. Not on the highway. :) Did you see all the Crocodiles Crossing signs before you hit the Keys? Crocs and gators. YIKES! In fact, I think south Florida is the only place in North America that HAS crocodiles. Everywhere else only has alligators. Call me "professor".

Eva Gallant said...

Ipenka: At least you got it...some people didn't!

Veg: I didn't see any of those crossing signs. Maybe they've stopped crossing?

Al Penwasser said...

But...they saw you.

Terri Sonoda said...

Awwwww, sorry you didn't see any alligators, Eva. But? Sooooo glad you didn't get gobbled up by one! Sheesh.
Stay safe and keep enjoying your trip!

Eva Gallant said...

Terri: thanks!!

rosaria said...

Ah, but alligators used to be there when those streets were named; and they may re-appear after a flood scoots them out of their murky holes. Florida is flat, with lots of swamp land here and there where developers have not poured concrete over those sink holes.

Vodka Logic said...

ha ha... sounds great. I have heard of dogs going missing down there too.

Have fun