Followers

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Saturday Silliness



Bird Talk

For forty years we have studied bird calls . There are so many different species, and to make it more difficult they have territorial accents just like people do.

The really amazing thing is, we have translated all of their calls. And the
message is always the same. No matter the breed or the location, the message is
always the same:

"Yay! Yay! Yay! Cats can't fly!"
********************

The Birds and the Bees


*********************


Explosive Advice


A tough old cowboy from South Texas counseled his granddaughter that if she
wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gun powder on
her oatmeal every morning.

 The granddaughter did this religiously to the age of 103 when she died. She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 45 great-grandchildren, 25 great-great-grandchildren, and a 15-foot hole where the
crematorium used to be.
************************




The Haircut

A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and asked, 'How long before I 
can get a haircut?'
The barber looked around the shop full of customers  and said, 'About 2 hours.'
The guy left.
A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?' 
The barber looked around at the shop and said, 'About 3 hours.'
The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the  shop and asked, 'How long before I can get a haircut?
The barber looked around the shop and said, 'About an hour and a half '
The guy left.  The barber turned to his friend and said, 'Hey,  Bob, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes.  He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but  then he doesn't ever come back.'
A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, 'So, where does that guy go when he leaves?'
Bob looked up, wiped the tears from his eyes and said, 'Your house!'

***************

EVA

9 comments:

Simone said...

Hilarious!!!

River said...

I love the gunpowder/crematorium one!
And the birds and bees one is cute.

Sue said...

hahaha

=D

rosaria williams said...

You've got enough silliness for the week!

Terri Sonoda said...

ROFLMFAO! "Your house"...priceless!

Brian Miller said...

ouch...your house...lol on the headache too...smiles....happy saturday eva...

Crack You Whip said...

The barber is my favorite! All funny!

Pat said...

The barber one? I did NOT see that one coming! Very funny!

ipenka said...

The barber one was hilarious!