Wednesday, November 28, 2012

WTF Wednesday

Every now and then, I run across a news item that makes me scratch my head and ask
"What the f*ck?"  Of course, I then feel compelled to share them with you.  Here's what
got me wondering this week:

In Miami, a man was charged with performing illegal dental work again after he administered 
a shot to a woman for a toothache and then kissed her bare buttocks.  When she had
complained of pain, he told her she would need to drop her draws so he could give her a shot.  After he gave her the shot, he touched her private area and then kissed her buttocks.  

He had been arrested once before in September for practicing dentistry with out a license in 
a Miami warehouse.  

He obviously needs to go back to dental school to learn which oriface houses teeth!


Then there was the sleepy robber:

In Ann Arbor, Michigan, a group of college roommates returned to their apartment after Thanksgiving dinner to find the place had been ransacked.   The burglar had raided the
 refrigerator and the liquor closet and apparently piled a laptop, other electronic equipment,
and some chicken near the door.

The students called the police, and in the course of their investigation, the officers found the
perpetrator asleep in an upstairs closet!

I guess we all need a nap after chowing down and having a few drinks on Thanksgiving.


I couldn't even paraphrase this one, and I wanted you to know that I did not make it up!

Cushing man gets jail for striking estranged wife with genitalia
Posted By Stephen Betts On November 23, 2012 (9:04 am) In Court NewsMidcoastNews

ROCKLAND, Maine — A 62-year-old Cushing man will spend five days in jail after pleading guilty Wednesday to
 assaulting his estranged wife.

Fred E. Thomas pleaded guilty to 180 days in jail with all but five days suspended and was placed on probation for a year for domestic violence assault and indecent conduct. A third charge of unlawful sexual contact was dismissed.

The incident occurred in July in Warren when his wife of 39 years, who was estranged from him, stayed at his place. He offered her $20 for sex, and when she refused he took out his penis and struck her with it, according to the prosecution’s version of events to which he pleaded guilty.

Defense Attorney Justin Andrus said Thomas was tremendously upset that his
marriage of 39 years was ending. He said his estranged wife was planning to go to Pakistan to meet a man she met online.

“This was not his normal conduct,” Andrus told Justice Jeffrey Hjelm during the
 sentencing hearing in Knox County Superior Court.  Assistant District Attorney Christopher Fernald asked for Thomas to serve seven days in jail while  Andrus
asked for just probation and no jail time.  Hjelm said a jail term was appropriate in this case.

“This was sexually aggressive conduct. This couldn't be much more offensive,” Hjelm said.

The wife did not seek jail time for Thomas but did ask that he undergo counseling for anger management, which was ordered.
Article taken from Bangor Daily News -

  There was no mention as to whether the defendant was asked to surrender his
weapon.  I suppose he elected to plead guilty so he would not have to allow the jury to
 examine the weapon!  Sorry, there were no photos accompanying  the story.

If you don't believe what you just read, check out the newspaper story here.




fishducky said...

NEVER underestimate the stupidity of human beings!!

Magical Mystical MiMi said...

Hahahahahaha! I love the genitalia story.. Omg.. So funny!

River said...

What?? He struck her with his willy? I'm surprised she didn't see it coming and step aside.

Brian Miller said...

well...there are certain inch requirements for assault with a deadly weapon...errr....

Becky said...

Hahaha the dentist one was the weirdest. And also is one of the many reasons why going to the dentist causes me anxiety! Love your blog. Visiting from YOUR visit on my blog from SITS! I'll def be back!

Stephen Hayes said...

I wonder if the weapon in that last story was half cocked.

Gail said...

Thanks...I just spewed my tea on the key board. Laughing...I was not trying to assault my computer.

Al Penwasser said...

He struck her...with his penis?
Mannnnnnn.........that is one gifted dude.
Or it wasn't attached.
In that case....
Mannnnnnn........that is one dude with a serious problem.

Joanna Jenkins said...

what!?!?! A shot in the butt for a pain in your mouth?!?! C-R-A-Z-Y.

These cracked me up. Really-- What a people thinking sometimes.

xo jj

Paula Jones said...

Amazing the things people do!

You, my dear, are very funny!! Glad to have found your blog!!

A Beer for the Shower said...

Wait, you mean it's not normal when your dentist does that? I always thought he was just kissing my butt for good luck...

Sandy Nachlinger said...

I'm trying to envision exactly how a man would strike a woman with his penis ... and it isn't a pretty picture! Thanks for posting these weird news stories.
(I just found your blog via the One Mixed Bag blog.)

Barbara said...

I'm wondering what the lady in the first one was thinking was going to happen when she went for dental work in a warehouse.

She Writes said...

Ummmmm, this gives P whipped a whole new meaning :)! Hilarious!

Dawn @Lighten Up! said...

A laptop and some chicken? Near the door? Then went upstairs to take a nap?
Well, it was Turkey Day.
lol Eva.

Sue said...

I am speechless.


Pearl said...

I'll be thinking about that, um, assault, for a while...

People are funny.