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Saturday, April 6, 2013

Saturday Silliness



The Fishing Trip

A man phones home from his office and says to his wife, "I have the chance to go 
fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime. I have to leave right 
away. Please pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk 
pajamas. I'll be home in an hour to pick them up." 
 
 The man rushes home to grab everything. He hugs his wife, apologizes for the 
short notice, and then hurries off. A week later, the man returns and his wife 
asks, "Did you have a good trip, dear?" 
 
 The man replies, "Yep, the fishing was great... but you forgot to pack my blue 
silk pajamas." 
 
 His wife smiles and says, "Oh, no I didn't... I put them in your tackle box!" 

*******************************

The Interview

A man is hiring for an accounting position, conducting interviews with each of 
the hopefuls. The first accountant walks in and starts to introduce himself.  
 
Accountant 1: "I'm here for the accounting position." 
 
Boss: "What's 2+2"? 
 
Accountant 1: "Four". 
 
Boss: "Get out". 
 
Confused, the applicant leaves the office and the next applicant walks in. 
 
Accountant 2: "Hi, I'm here for the accounting position". 
 
Boss: "What's 2+2"? 
 
Accountant 2: "Four". 
 
Boss: "Get out". 
Just as confused as the first applicant, he leaves thinking that if the boss is 
that stupid he doesn't want to work there anyway  He passes applicant #3 as he 
enters the bosses office. 
Accountant 3: "Hi, I'm here for the accounting position". 
 
Boss: "What's 2+2"? 
Accountant 3: "Anything you want it to be". 

Boss: "You're hired"! 

*****************************

Playground Scuffle
Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and
torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his 
father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened. 
 
 "Well, Dad," said Pete, " I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave 
him his choice of weapons." 
 
 "Uh-huh," said the father, "that seems fair." 
 
 "I know, but I never thought he'd choose his sister!" 
**********************
Family Reunion

There was a family  gathering, With all generations  around the table.  Mischievous teenagers  put a Viagra tablet  into  Grandpa's drink, And after a while,  Grandpa excused himself because he had to go  to the bathroom.  When he returned,  however, his trousers were wet all  over.
'What happened,  Grandpa?'  He was asked by his  concerned children.
'Well,' he answered,  'I don't really know. I had to go to the  bathroom.  So I took it out  and started to pee, but then I saw that it  wasn't mine, so I put it  back!'
*****************************************
EVA

8 comments:

Brian Miller said...

ha, anything you want it to be...spoken like a true accountant...and that first guy is SO busted...smiles.

Jeannine Breton said...

HMMMM!!!! poor applicants....I guess he didn't need his tackle box, not for the fishing he was doing !!

rosaria williams said...

They are all great today. Can't choose.

Dazee Dreamer said...

oh my, that 3rd one was great

Stephen Hayes said...

...put them in your tackle box. Hysterical!

Pat said...

That was one smart wife.....and one stupid husband! :)

Sue said...

Loved the second one best of all. My husband and son are both in accounting.

=)

PS. Well, I should say my husband WAS in accounting, now that he's retired!

Unknown Mami said...

What an agreeable accountant.