Wednesday, May 29, 2013

WTF Wednesday

Another week has sped by and once again it's time for me to share those news items I encounter that make me scratch my head and ask, "What the f*ck?"

This week we have---

Pants With Benefits

Or, as they are also called, "Romance Pants!  These titillating trousers are electrified, so to speak; when the zipper is lowered, so are the lights in the room, and romantic music starts playing.  Unfasten the button at the waist, and candles ignite.  These slick slacks set a sexy scenario for lovers!

I was unable to load the video to my blog and have it functional, but here's the url, if you want to check it out:    Don't worry, it's not x-rated, but it does show how these Lothario Levis are meant to  perform!

I'd be concerned that peeing in them might be a petrifying, electrifying experience!  You must might want to keep a fire extinguisher handy!  I'm just sayin'.


Divin' in the Divan?

Gerard Streator was arrested for having curbside coitus with a couch.  A Wisconsin police officer, out for a jog, spotted Streator poking the pillows with his penis.  Apparently, police perceive public pillow poking as "lewd and lascivious behavior" which carries a maximum penalty of 9 months in jail.

Poor guy.... he probably mistook the couch for a love seat!  He should have taken his "date" home before getting amorous!


Shoulda' Studied

A 19-year-old college student in Atlanta faked his own kidnapping to avoid having to tell his parents he was flunking English.  Aftab Aslam bought a cell phone and texted his parents a story about being kidnapped.  He then went camping for a week, but when the weather turned cold and rainy, he went home.  He is being held without bail on charges of making a false report, false statements, tampering with evidence, and terrorist threats.

Wouldn't it have been easier to just 'fess up that he was failing?


Butt Dial Busted

If you've ever butt-dialed someone with your cell phone by accident, I hope you had better luck then these two!  With a pocketed cell phone, one of the two fellows above butt-dialed 911 and then proceeded to talk about his need for weed.  Nathan Tecklemariam and Carson Rinehart were unable to hear the dispatch operator, but she heard them, loud and clear!

As they made plans to break into a car, she contacted the police when she heard the crash of breaking glass.  Sargent Jaime Rios was able to apprehend the two 20-year-olds and charge them with breaking and entering and possession of stolen property.  The call was still open when they were arrested.  The officer disconnected the call himself.

 "This phone called 911? Damn!" was the reaction of one of the perps, who couldn't wrap his mind around what happened.

Now that's a new way of turning yourself in!


Enough head-scratching for today!



Brian Miller said...

haha....just imagining the guy electrocuting himself...interesting premise to those pants with a couch...i just shake my head...

River said...

I guess that guy just loved that couch!
As for the jeans...who thinks up these crazy things???
I've never butt-dialled anyone, I don't keep my phone where I could sit on it.

The Dose of Reality said...

HA HA HA!! Those pants are HILARIOUS! Oh my Lord, we LOVE them!-The Dose Girls

Stephen Hayes said...

Just what I need, a pair of pants more romantic than I am!

Eddie Bluelights said...

I've just bought a pair of Jeans - I am bitterly disappointed that it has no accessories to enhance my romantic endeavours. Yet it might be very dangerous because I would run the risk of either burning my most cherished possession with a candle or electrocuting myself. The risks one has to endure to pursue true passion LOL.

Just loved these, Eva

On a more serious note I have some very sad news at my place. Hugs ~ Eddie x

Kimberly said...

Stop it. Pants?
Can you imagine being that person who found that guy and the couch. I wonder if he bought it dinner before he reached into its cushions :)

fishducky said...

Those pants are absolutely unbelievable!!

Merlesworld said...

It sure is a weird world and the people in it even weirder.

Joanna Jenkins said...

"...he probably mistook the couch for a love seat!" Ha! The idiot.

And faking a kidnapping to get out of telling his folks he'd failing. I would not want to be around that dinner table for a while. Again, idiot!

But the guy with the fancy pants takes it. What a hoot! Thanks for the laugh.

xo jj

Jeannine Breton said...

omg!! Eva, you are something.....those jeans....maybe the guy that buys them gets pleasure just unzipping.......!!!!!

A Beer For The Shower said...

How do you have sex with a couch? No, you know what, I don't want to know.

Also, with those pants, what happens if you have to pee? You go to the bathroom, and in the main room the lights lower and music starts playing. Then you come back and it stops. For a date, that sounds horrifying.

Sue said...