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Saturday, July 20, 2013

Saturday Silliness


Teacher asks the kids in class, "Do you know what you want to be when you grow 
up?" 
 
Johnny. "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the 
best girlfriend, give her a Ferrari, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in 
Paris, a jet to travel around the world, an infinite visa card, and make love to 
her three times a day". 
 
The teacher, not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child decides 
not to give importance to what he said and continues the lesson. 
 
And you, Tanya? 
 
Yes mam, I want to be Johnny's girlfriend!! 

**********************





********************

The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too 
upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." 
 
On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you 
down?" 
 
"Yes," the boy's mother answered. 
 
"And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. 
 
"Who cares?" the mother replied. 


*************



**************************



After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the 
clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get 
his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth 
hole about twenty minutes ago?" 
 
"Yes," the golfer responded. 
 
"Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the 
course?" 
 
"Yes, I did. How did you know?" he asked. 
 
"Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway 
and crashed through a driver's windshield. The car went out of control, crashing 
into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it to the 
fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?" 
 
The golfer thought it over carefully and responded... 
 
"I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right 
thumb." 

********************

EVA

10 comments:

Brian Miller said...

ha, smart on that first girl...smiles...oh my a little over medicated on the next...smiles


happy saturday eva....

Pat said...

I've saved many of bottle of wines over the course of my life! Just call me a hero! ;)

fishducky said...

Just as I expected--FUNNY!!

rosaria williams said...

Hey, I can understand that mother's dilemma!

Stephen Hayes said...

I know a few golfers who would have responded in the same way as that guy in your last story. Very Funny!

Eva Gallant said...

Brian: Happy Saturday to you, too!

Pat: You deserve the keys to the city, or a medal at the very least for your service!

fishducky: Thanks...one of those was from you!

rosaria: I could have used a few good drugs when my kids were teenagers!

Stephen: Glad I gave you a chuckle!

Merlesworld said...

I wouldn't mind being his girlfriend too, I guess I'm to old.
When shopping at the supermarket a lot of the mothers look drugged out or should be.
Once a golfer always a golfer.
Merle........

River said...

I fail to see how wanting to be a billionaire etc constitutes bad behaviour. After all, many of us would like to be billionaires. wouldn't we?

Charlotte Crawley said...

As a retired teacher I really liked the billionaire and Tanya's idea. But as a mother of a very willful child no one ever prescribed tranquilizers for me--it could have changed my life.

Sue said...

haha

Last two are my favorites. Especially the last one.

=)