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Friday, June 13, 2014

Weekend Silliness

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E , F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes?

If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out What the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed! 

{
A} Almost Boobs. 
{B} Barely there

{C} Can't Complain.
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake
.{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I've fallen And I can't get up!



(Thanks to River for this one!)

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Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. 

The frog hopped into the princesses lap and said: "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am, and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so." 

That night, the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sautéed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and shallot cream sauce.



(that was from fishducky!  Thanks, Fran!)


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COLLECTED WISDOM
·                I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people. I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.
·                I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now.
·                You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If they are holding a gun, she's probably angry.
·                Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
·                You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That's common sense leaving your body.
·                I don't like making plans for the day because then the word "premeditated" get's thrown around in the courtroom.
·                I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row,
·                I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim.  I feel so much better saying I went to the jim this morning.
·                Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers, if you find one, what's your plan?

(thanks to my friend B.J. for that one!)


EVA

6 comments:

Al Penwasser said...

To those paranoid people: put your clothes back on for one thing.

Stephen Hayes said...

I've gone to the "Jim" twice this morning.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari Om
...but what about my 'k' cup??? YAM xx

Merlesworld said...

You can keep a golf club in your bathroom, I have one near the front door. I should be thin, I been to the jim many times.
Merle..........

River said...

Could you edit to remove my real name please?
I've been to the Jim so often today I should weigh nothing or be very fit by now, but neither has happened.

Eva Gallant said...

Al: Good advice!

Stephen: Good for you!

Yamini: We want photographic proof of those K cups!

Merle: Not a bad idea, the golf club.

River: Done!